REFER TO GREY: Contemplations by Robert Greigos © 2007-2024

Carly told me she wasn't angry, but she was.

Sue told me she was, then wouldn't speak to me again.

Josephine stomped away in a huff.

Margaret didn't show up for our date, then wouldn't take my calls.

Jennifer called me a pompous ass and a jerk.

Renee slammed the door in my face.

Katherine went silent during our conversation, then left while I paid the bill.

Sherry went berserk and started throwing things.

Mrs. Crepeshaw, Donna, Elaine, and Becky passed around a petition to get me evicted.

The mail lady refused to deliver my mail, putting it in someone else's box instead.

Carmen sent her two brothers to beat the crap out of me.

Maureen told me in no uncertain terms she never wanted to lay eyes on me again.

Paula slapped my face, then threatened to take out her gun and shoot me.

My buddies tell me it used to be a man's world. Don't know what guys once did to manage that, but it's doubtful they just stood there and took whatever was dished out. More likely they cracked the whip, cut off funds, and issued ultimatums. But, none of those responses are viable these days. No, seems more like we're into an age of negotiation. We've got one side feelin' their oats, realizin' they ain't without power, while the other side's tryin' to figure what non-abusive, non-coercive power they really do have. It ain't an easy mix. Few folks have found an answer. What seems to work in one situation absolutely doesn't in others.

Strikes me as if we aren't quite used to sizing each other up in respectful terms just yet. We got too many unrealistic expectations and we're too hyped on the notion of not quittin' 'til we get everything we want. There ain't nothin' wrong with a strong woman, nor a gentle man. And there ain't nothin' wrong with entertaining a little doubt and uncertainty, considerin' we might be wrong or there may be another way to look at things. And there's certainly plenty to be gained learnin' to find interest and pleasure in sharin' what we do have right here in front of us.

Even if one side wins the war, what really will they have? Takes an awful lot of energy to maintain walls of divide and keep the riffraff out. Far easier to respectfully accept, seek to understand, share, plan, and coordinate with one another.